Shamanistic Necro Super Datefest <X

[Clam]

<X
SHAMANISTIC NECRO SUPER DATEFEST




Self-effacing description
You don't have to be a necrophiliac. But just in case, we won't judge. This all happens in international waters. TAKE TO THE SEA


Generally impossible long-term objectives
TBA

Specifically impossible short-term objectives
-be a team
-compete in SkyLeague 9
-not be last
-enjoy rituals


Roster
Chief Head Cone Corpse Lord Zurxblgvd
APPARENTLY CLAM FOR NOW
Southeast Pacific Regional Oceanic Necromancer/Anti-burrowing Exhumation Expert/Quality Calcium Carbonate Collector
APPARENTLY ALSO CLAM
Mildly Empowered Nerve-grazing Ritual Participants
Aki
Apathy
Arsenal
blarg
Bob
buffalosoldier
Clapon
Slender
Starscream

Wanderers of the Sullenly Festering Earth
Alnilam
Genesis
ViPR
Trexy
{R.I.P}M-pilot

Bearer of the Consistently Burning and Mortally Toxic Quad-Spiral Shell
Kiya

Constant Sack Adjusters and BDSM Addicts-in-residence at 90 Despicable Indecisions of Life and Death Lane, Belt Buckle Gazer, VA 60666
fun
UFO
Donk

Mode: Ball, for now

***RECRUITMENT IS NOW CLOSED***
***LIKE HOW DYKE WISHES HIS ANAL CAVITY WAS AFTER MAKING A TYPO***
THANK YOU FOR YOUR REAL OR IMAGINED INTEREST
PLEASE APPLY NEXT SEASON

Sponsored by John Duncan and Funnyhell

[sunshineduck]

sweet bullets

[Clam]

****
<reserved>

temp desig

WR
*fun
UFO
Arsenal (-)
Donk (-)

TE
Aki
blarg
Bob

O-line
Clapon (alt TE)
Starscream (alt WR)
Slender (alt TE, ping)

D-line
Apathy
buffalosoldier (-)
Clam

Subs
Alnilam (-)
Genesis (-)
ViPR (-)
Trexy (-)
{R.I.P}M-pilot

*O/D coordinator

[lakospeter91]

"LIKE THE INFINITE VENDING MACHINE WHERE MALACATS GETS HIS QUESTION MARKS"

This in itself is convincing enough to join.

[Shinshinai]

I dont get a special mention for being mascot?
i feel ...
grmbls clam, you could atleast put my right name on there...

[XX1]

http://hippohippo.ytmnd.com/

[.:leopluradon.::.GrApe:.]

clam you havnt added tbh yet

[Clam]

UPDATE 1: Achievement of Subtle Notoriety
We extend a cold and slowly decomposing welcome to our new acolytes.

UPDATE 2: A Wild Protagonist Appears
Our cult "tag" can take up to 4 equally nefarious forms. These are interchangeable and display linearity of expectation as well as being unbiased and somewhat consistent predictors of success as game sample size approaches infinity:
1) <X
2) GG.
3) .GG
4) .gg

The following are appropriate examples of a "tag":
<X ShamanLover123
GG.ShamanLover123
ShamanLover123.GG
ShamanLover123.gg

Note that gg.ShamanLover123 is NOT a valid format*

*all definitive statements made herein, in the past, and for the infinite future are subject to change with much-delayed notice

[BrazNomar]

Originally Posted by Clam

These are interchangeable and display linearity of expectation as well as being unbiased and somewhat consistent predictors of success as game sample size approaches infinity:

If I wasn't leading a team myself, I'd join just for that statistician talk <3

[Mr Nice]

clams > oysters

[Moon]

Originally Posted by Mr Nice

clams > oysters

But.. pearls...

[Clam]

Originally Posted by Moon

But.. pearls...

Maybe we're just better at not whoring out our bodies for quick cash. Have you ever bought a clam pearl? Didn't think so. We make 'em, we save 'em. For our own lady clams, not random two-footed, largely hairless, typo-ridden apesluts.

[Shinshinai]

Originally Posted by Clam

UPDATE 3: Mascot with wings:

CLAM U NEVER DO LISTEN! :/

Kiya here, i have wings <3, they look like dis (\ /)

[Clam]

UPDATE 4: Grave Space Filled
Self-explanatory. One spot is reserved for last-minute blood virgin substitutions.

UPDATE 5: Achievement of Minor Anti-Loathing
We successfully achieved several of our short-term sub-goals:
1.2) multiple acolytes and even Fo showed up on Sunday
1.5a) multiple acolytes and eventually Fo were ready to play immediately on Sunday
2.1) multiple acolytes including Fo actually played full games on Sunday
0) multiple acolytes and hopefully Fo had shamanistic necro super fun on Sunday

UPDATE 6: Kiya
Kiya is there. He has wings. They look like that.

[Slender]

so here i was, watching myself some good godfather part 2, no idea if that's the real name but hey, its part 2. when all of sudden, around midnight, i got a cute messg from vanish telling that ladder was hitting it hard, im (old black man voice) god damn, what the **** and in 2 seconds i decided to pause the movie and get the hell in altitude and rape some vaginas. it really hadn't passed 1 hour when funnygoofus was yelling that he needed sleep and im liek mothafcuker, i can't succumb to that crap and so i started to awaken myself up but eventually, ladder extended itself until 3 in the morning and yet again, im trying to awaken myself up

y'all need to as well.



and this, clam said so, idk. i thoroughly believe he's asian

[XX1]

Originally Posted by Slender

clam said so

[Slender]

[Funnyhell]

Told clam i'd post so here. Good luck <X and hope you like the name! make me proud!



P.S. Don't soil my name as sponsor

[Fartface]

I won't be there Sunday

[Slender]

fart what the ****

[Slender]

HOLA GENTE, SOLO VENGO A DECIRLES QUE POR FAVOR SE PRESENTEN MAÑANA A LAS 7PM GMT (TIEMPO DE ALTITUDE)

ES POSIBLE QUE NO LOGRE ASISTIR YA QUE ANDARÉ FUERA DE LA CIUDAD PERO LLEVARÉ MI LAPTOP Y HARÉ LO POSIBLE POR PRESENTARME. EN TODO CASO, LES DESEO LA MEJOR DE LA SUERTE.

stelios~~

[XX1]

Originally Posted by Slender

HOLA GENTE, SOLO VENGO A DECIRLES QUE POR FAVOR SE PRESENTEN MAÑANA A LAS 7PM GMT (TIEMPO DE ALTITUDE)

ES POSIBLE QUE NO LOGRE ASISTIR YA QUE ANDARÉ FUERA DE LA CIUDAD PERO LLEVARÉ MI LAPTOP Y HARÉ LO POSIBLE POR PRESENTARME. EN TODO CASO, LES DESEO LA MEJOR DE LA SUERTE.

stelios~~

[Slender]

Originally Posted by XX1

[Clam]

Originally Posted by Slender

ES POSIBLE QUE NO LOGRE ASISTIR YA QUE ANDARÉ FUERA DE LA CIUDAD

[Slender]

Originally Posted by Clam

Originally Posted by Slender

PERO LLEVARÉ MI LAPTOP Y HARÉ LO POSIBLE POR PRESENTARME

[Clam]

UPDATE 7: SKYLEAGUE WEEK 1
<X vs. {arr}: 2-0


<X vs. [BBQ]: 0-2


Clam vs. Dyke's DDoS: 0-23


Slender vs. his grandma: unknown


Our unholy and craftily unique brand of teamwork has garnered us our first win OF ALL TIME AND SPACE. The underworld rejoices.

[Clam]

UPDATE 8: Ritual Summoning Process
In the deepest depths of the very unfathomably deep ocean, strange and immeasurably frightening creatures twitch cutely and slowly awaken from their long multi-millennial slumber. Ominously flickering bioluminescent signals flash along incomprehensible routes.

[blarg]

Originally Posted by Clam

UPDATE 8: Ritual Summoning Process
In the deepest depths of the very unfathomably deep ocean, strange and immeasurably frightening creatures twitch cutely and slowly awaken from their long multi-millennial slumber. Ominously flickering bioluminescent signals flash along incomprehensible routes.

is this a spell to summon alnilam?

edit:

[ex~]

hi clam chars

[Aki1024]

Slightly off topic but very important PSA
<X

[Slender]

Originally Posted by Funnyhell

This ****ing thread and clan...

Much wow.

And no clam, no pics for that sick necro fetish of yours

[ufo]

Originally Posted by Funnyhell

This ****ing thread and clan...

Much wow.

And no clam, no pics for that sick necro fetish of yours

[Slender]

hey amigos, don't forget to get up early tomorrow and show up for sl

[Clam]

UPDATE 9: SKYLEAGUE WEEK 2

<X vs. {ball}: 0-2


<X vs. <we ❤ spec chat>: 0-2


Clam vs. Dyke's DDoS, Round 2: 0-331


Alnilam vs. heartfelt promises and Clam's hopes and dreams: 1-0



UPDATE 10: Attendance Clam'd (Notorious Achievement of Significant Lack of Anti-Regressive Progress)

10.1) We extend a wholly depraved, blood-soaked, and possibly illegal welcome to our newest and ambiguously anti-permanent member, fun, who is probably only with us for a short amount of time to facilitate his attempts at scoring a sixer in an official SkyLeague match.

10.2) A free, unused chloroform rag complete with duct tape and panty gag shall be sent to as thanks to LeKai, who on short notice was willing to be our 6th or 7th player this week.

10.3) We were again able to field a full team for almost all 4 games despite the conspicuous lack of Alnilam, Aki, ViPR, UFO, and multifarious others who have probably been lost to the gore-finned spotted pyrobeast of the Kuril–Kamchatka Trench subduction zone, which has been spotted as far east of its normal territory as Baja California.

10.3a) We will probably not mourn them.

[Radium]

to be honest, had i seen this thread before, i wouldn't've joined

[Slender]

Originally Posted by Radium

to be honest, had i seen this thread before, i wouldn't've joined

the greatest thing you've ever done

bienvenido

[Clam]

Originally Posted by Aki1024

S̶l̶i̶g̶h̶t̶l̶y̶ ̶o̶f̶f̶ ̶t̶o̶p̶i̶c̶ ̶b̶u̶t̶ EXCEEDINGLY ON TOPIC AND very important PSA
<X

Incredibly relevant in every possible way, you need to see this, voty 2013, calcium carbonate plays a major role the entire time, anti-airworm with an almost post-Pearson feel, essential subsurface-chemistrycore, highly recommended

Definitely a different take on the typical audiovisual seaxperience but unquestionably on par with top tier alt-masturbation contenders vid1 and vid2

[Radium]

this is my official resignation

[Clam]

UPDATE 11: Life (Or Lack Thereof) As Usual

11.1) Slightly less obnoxious update font size seeing as this is possibly the least important and most sparingly read thread on the legal internet.

11.2) WB fun to the SNSD squad.
11.2a) If we can protect the time-honored concepts of enjoyability and base amusements espoused by this young kid-man, a sixer for him (it?) is not out of the question! Our best shot is this Sunday, so show up or be forever doomed to walk dejectedly in a tiny ever-shrinking spiral of misery while your mom talks about her night with Malacats and how great it was.

11.3) Clam vs vB caps lock filter: 0-2

[Slender]

I really feel like this is a very important thing for the team.